Dear mahogany,

My wife has been using sex toys on herself for a while and even though I noticed I just decided to ignore because it doesn’t affect our sex lives. On the contrary she is more exciting and active during sex in recent times and I must confess, I have been enjoying it. However, last week she said she would like us to use a sex toy together in the bedroom and I can’t imagine why. She keeps saying I would enjoy it and it’s good for our sex life.

I love my wife but I feel like asking her to stop using the sex toys again. I am beginning to think that I am not enough for her anymore. What if she makes the sex toy my replacement. I love her new confidence in the bedroom but is it healthy introducing sex toys in the bedroom and how does it help our sex life?


Dear Anon,

Thanks for reaching out. Before I begin I need you to stop seeing the sex toy as your competition and more as an ally.

Before you feel like the sex toy is a replacement, I need you to ask yourself if you feel like there is something lacking in your sex life. Or maybe she has a higher libido than yours.

Your wife must have felt something missing in your sex lives before she decided to spice things up with sex toys which in turn has greatly improved your sex life. According to research, couples who use sex toys in the bedroom have healthier sex lives and better bedroom confidence. .

Here are four ways a sex toy in the bedroom can help your sex life.

  1. It creates deeper intimacy among couples. Through sex toys, couples are able to explore and get knowledge of what they want sexually. The more you learn about your partner, the more exciting your sex life
  2. It leads to better communication. Using a sex toy in your bedroom as a couple helps bridge the communication gap. You would be able to speak up and be more mindful of each other’s’ desire.
  3. It takes the pressure off you- you can let go of the performance anxiety that is very common among men and through a sex toy, pleasure and learn about your partner’s body so you know where to shift your focus to the next time.
  4. It leads to a better sex life which leads to an emotional, physical and happy relationship.

Either ways, if you still have your reservations about using one, talking about it with your partner is the first step. Tell her your worries and fears and look into it together as a couple. However, if you decide to give it a try, I’m pretty sure you would enjoy the moment. If you are confused about choosing a sex toy, Click here to shop with Mahogany and browse through her love toys or chat Mahogany on WhatsApp with 08097893000 for a private consultation.



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