13 May ON MOTHERHOOD + SEXUALITY
Everyday young women are encouraged to embrace their sexuality and own their bodies. Women are asked to dictate what they want in the bedroom, we encourage girls to stop body shaming and slut shaming and to feel sexy in whatever size we come in. But when Kim Kardashian posts a nude picture of her body online, women come out like an army to criticize her, to caution her to take down her picture, not because it seems offensive but because she is a mother, a mother without any form of positive message to pass across to her child.
I may not be the biggest fan of Kim Kardashian but the hypocrisy in the comments got me thinking. Does motherhood and sexuality exist on different sides of the pole. I know they say motherhood makes you conscious of certain things, but does motherhood strip women of their sexuality. I know as women we experience changes in our bodies after childbirth, our stomach may not be as flat as it used to be, or our breasts perkier or our ass firmer, but does it make us plain? Do we stop seeing the need to dress up because we are mothers or the African system frowns at it and calls us irresponsible.
I know as mothers the stress of keeping a home, taking care of the children, working and taking care of a husband plus in-laws if you have them around you can be completely exhausting. Sometimes, you forget to paint those lovely toe nails of yours, buy that sexy lingerie, have a night out with your girlfriends or even change your hair. But motherhood should not stop you from wearing those heels you feel sexy in, or that gown that brings out your curve or wearing that lingerie to bed because it makes you feel like Amber Rose reincarnated. And if you are a single mother/divorced don’t hold yourself from going on those dates that make you feel like a goddess.
Motherhood is a blessing, but before you became mothers you were girls, young girls who were desired to be touched by their lovers with giggles stuck in their throat, your girlhood metamorphosed into womanhood, and at this stage you learnt to embrace your sexuality, fully conscious of your bodies and what brings you pleasure. As mothers, embracing our sexuality shouldn’t become a chore. Today on mother’s day, look in the mirror past your children, into the eyes of the young woman you once were and reclaim your sexuality.
Happy Mother’s Day to all mothers’ and mothers to be all over the world. Don’t stop being awesome, we love you.