My Boyfriend will leave me if I don’t have Sex with Him

I’m 17 years old this month and my boyfriend is 18. We have been dating for just over a year and a half. I will admit we have sex very regularly, like about 10 times a week, but the problem is, i don’t know how to say no to sex with him!  I have only EVER said no to sex ONCE and he got so angry and upset about it that it made m feel like I cant say no anymore.  I feel so guilty and ashamed because I say yes even though I don’t want to, and i have to fake my orgasms just so he can get off. PLEASE help me! I feel like he will break up with me if i say no to him again!!

– Angel, 17yrs old

Dear Angel,

First off, you can say NO to anything and anyone. the problem here is your fear of losing your boyfriend.

At your age, it is understandable that your relationship is very sexual. You are at the prime of sexual explorations and self-discovery. As you grow older and find your place, you may tend to have less sex than you are having now and this will open up room for more in your relationship.

We have to say this though, DON’T make an habit of self-sacrificing. A relationship starts to go sour when one person begins to feel like they are sacrificing too much for their partner’s pleasure or ego. If you want to save your relationship, you have to communicate. If you have to start that conversation with NO, please do!

Tell him how you feel. If he is as serious about you as you are about him, he will adjust. If he gets mad again or threatens to leave, then you have your answer. Don’t be afraid to move on. You are so young and you have the world at your feet.


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