7 Common misconceptions about bdsm
BDSM is a widely misunderstood sexual orientation in fact, there are more more than 10 common misconceptions about bdsm, but we will be considering 10 common misconceptions that most people have believed to be true.
A quick summary on bdsm
BDSM is a term used to describe certain aspects of sex that can be split into six major groups that make up the acronym BDSM: bondage and discipline, domination and submission, sadism and masochism. The following ideologies are purely misconceptions and they far from the truth about bdsm.
BDSM is ABUSE!
Bdsm is not abuse. It might appear to be so when certain acts of bdsm are displayed but it is not. What differentiates abuse and the practice of BDSM is consent, consent is the most important factor of engaging in BDSM. No matter how degrading you feel the subject is being treated, so long as there is consent, there is no abuse involved.
The 3 Levels of Consent
Consent is required and should be granted at 3 stages – which means that both parties should be able to communicate before, during, and after a scene or moment to make sure everyone is on the same page. It is worthy of note that BDSM in a healthy, consensual environment is not abuse. It is a physical manifestation of desires and urges, no matter how dark or intense.
Female Dominants Hate Men and vice-versa!
In bdsm, Submission by men is no less gratifying and fulfilling for female dominants than it is for male dominants. Women who prefer the dominant role do so to the brimming extent of their communicated agreements. OK! I know some of the more sadistic women/men enjoy inflicting pain on their subs, talking about inflicting pain on the penis and balls, obviously painful penetration with different objects and the like, but as long as it is consensual, you can be rest assured that those subs love taking whatever their Dominant dishes out. Dominants do not necessarily hate their subs but they simply share a connection by agreement to pleasure each other with their role which is not something you do with someone you hate.
You have to stick to a particular Role all the time!
No! Not So! This is a very common misconception about bdsm and even people who already practice it also hold this misconception. The truth is, there is no standard or static handbook that states you have to be a particular role when practicing bdsm. Although there are some kinksters who will rather play a particular role or nothing else, but it noteworthy that some kinksters became so, out of boredom, so therefore, changing roles from time to time makes it even more interesting and fun, the act itself is amusing and erotic for a lot of people who have been practicing it for a while so switching roles makes it even more gratifying.
No blacks! Only Westerners are into Bdsm!
That’s not true! There are several bdsm lovers even here in Africa, and you’ll be shocked that there are kinksters living close to you. Sexual orientations cuts across every race, culture and personalities, you cannot tell someone’s sexual preference based on their race.
You can spot a bdsm lover in one glance
I don’t think you can! There are so many submissive kinks that take on really bossy roles in their regular day to day life and you may be mistaken to think they will most likely have a regular sex life, He or she mat be someone’s loyal kitty!
Bdsm damages people both emotionally
This is not true at all, when bdsm is done the right way, it can balance the powerplay in any relationship. Bdsm also helps people find their voice in situations where their regular lifestyle does not give them the power they need emotionally. Bdsm role play can fill up this space of the emotional needs you crave for in reality
Bdsm is dangerous
Just like every other field of endeavor in life has risks and dangers attached to them, bdsm also has its own risks and the advised pattern for any bdsm lover is to apply as much safety precautions as possible and pay attention to the parties involved and also respect the safe words you agreed on.
