He Wants Me To Become Lekpa

Dear Mahogany,

I met this guy two months ago on Tinder so we have been talking for sometime and we have met each other once.  Things were going well till last two weeks he asked me out and I told him I will think about it. He then started making statements like if I date him I’m so going to lose weight and how he likes his girls lekpa. I like this guy and I’m not against loosing weight but shouldn’t he accept me the way I am. Should I date him? What if I don’t loose weight will he still like me? I’m confused.

Anonymous.

Dear Anonymous,

Dating sites are a tricky place to hook up. Asides from the fact that blind dates are basically like shooting in the wind, they tend to go wrong quickly with unrealistic expectations. Your Tinderman clearly is one of those people with this kind of expectations.

That said, your body size has nothing to do with how you connect with people. Like a car, for a relationship to work, it has to have their right parts to begin with. One of those important parts is connection. 

Tinderman seems like the type to get stuck on the body work. He may or may not ever pay attention to what’s beneath the surface. You deserve better and you should never settle for anything less than true connection.

It is entirely up to you to decide whether to lose weight or add weight. Your body size should not factor in whether or not a person likes you

In fact, when a person likes you, they don’t give you ultimatums to change yourself for them. That is a bad sign and it points to a controlling and manipulative nature.

Run. You’ll never be right for him even if you drop to size 2. Your Mr Right is still out there.

Love,

Mahogany.