I WAS CIRCUMCISED

Dear Mahogany, I was circumcised as a child.

I am a married woman, but I have a huge problem. I don’t enjoy sex with my husband because I do not feel anything. I was abused as a child, at age 3, I was circumcised. It was a cultural thing, and my parents felt it was right to curb my sexual drive before I even had one.

Now I am married, and I feel sex is really overrated.  I do not enjoy any bit of it. Anytime we are about to go into it, I always insist the lights are off because I don’t want my husband to see my reaction. I never told I was circumcised because I don’t want him to see me as an outcast.

I try to satisfy my husband by giving him a blowjob, but I know he wants more even though he is not complaining. Please how do you suggest I go about my sexual life and satisfying my husband?

Miriam.

Dear Miriam,

Thanks for reaching out to us. Female circumcision is a real menace that has deprived a lot of women the joy of having a successful sexual life. You are not alone and you don’t have to go through this issue alone.

The first thing you need to do is to open up to your husband. You need to have a deep heart to heart conversation with your husband. You owe this to yourself and your husband, and if truly your husband loves you, then he will stand by you no matter what.

Next you need to seek therapy and counselling. There are a lot of credible sex therapist out there, I advise that you seek one that you will be very comfortable with.

Finally you should not look down on yourself or allow this situation make you lose your self-esteem no matter what. You are a very strong and brave woman.

Love,

Mahogany.